When you go about your day have you ever noticed how many people have poker faces?
I would be willing to bet quite a few. It seems as though when I'm out and about during my day that often people are visibly surprised when you smile at them. Then once the fleeting surprise has passed a smile is returned by them. So often it's that we go about our days in a blur, not really noticing the details… the people around us. We go through the motions of saying things like "Hi, how are you today?" and if you live in Texas "Oh, this weather is crazy, huh? One day it's ninety, the next it's raining and seventy degrees." We admittedly go about our days with these standard sayings not really connecting with anyone.
But what we really crave is transparency and authenticity. What you've been through. What your hopes are. What you've struggled with. What makes your voice crack with emotion. What you want to see change in the world for the better. It's these conversations that are meaningful… that are real and what helps us all connect… that makes our differences seem not so different and bridges the gap between assumptions and truth.
And yet… it's so often that we hide… we edit ruthlessly… we cringe…
hoping people will like what they see…
us, the tidy package we may present for the outside world to see.
But it's not just out in the public, in the world that we do this… this edited dialogue may be what is happening at home… with our loved ones, our families, our spouses. Has your spouse or your child become a stranger to you? Do you wish you were connecting better? Maybe you yearn inside for a closer bond and yet the words escape your lips of what on earth to say. Maybe you settle for a hug and the comforting silence between you… and some days that satisfies… just physical closeness, the warmth of someone else. And yet… perhaps there are days you wish for more.
People today are hungry for connection.
When we open up and share our innermost thoughts, our fears, our, past, our struggles… they no longer hold any power over us… and it enables us to connect to others on a deeper level.
Learning Something New Even In Our Marriage…
As time goes by in our marriage we may believe we already know everything about our spouses. We may finish each others sentences, we may know their favorite foods, how they take their coffee and what they prefer in bed. We may certainly know a lot but there is always the chance we could learn more… something new and unexpected.
Maybe there's something new to learn about our children as well… they are rapidly changing as they graduate from grade schooler to pre-teen and grow through the teenage years… their likes and dislikes are constantly evolving… what they dream of doing one day, their beliefs, their goals, etc.
Here is a list of thirty questions to ask the person you love, to get to know them better… maybe for someone you just started dating… or even your sister, mom, or bestie. You may already know (or think you do) the answers to some… but maybe some will be a surprise.
1. Describe your perfect day.
2. What makes you cry?
3. What are you most grateful for?
4. What super power would you want to have?
5. What do you value most in friendship?
6. What's the worst thing that's happened to you?
7. What is your favorite memory?
8. Complete this sentence: I really want to ______ with _______.
9. What is your most embarrassing moment?
10. What do you not find funny?
11. What have you not told someone that you know you need to? Why haven't you?
12. What is your definition of success?
13. What was your last prayer?
14. When you blow out the candles on the birthday cake do you make a wish?
15. Describe a happy moment and what song was playing.
16. If you could go anywhere in the world right now where would it be?
17. What worries you?
18. What impact do you want to leave on the world?
19. What behaviors are you unwilling to tolerate?
20. What is your biggest accomplishment?
21. What makes you smile?
22. When did you not speak up and wish you had?
23. What was the last bible verse you read?
24. Would you do anything differently if you knew no one would judge you?
25. What is your biggest fear?
26. What is your biggest hope?
27. What do you thank God for the most often?
29. What is your favorite mental snapshot?
30. What's the kindest thing you've ever done for someone?
© gps-gracepowerstrength.blogspot.com ~ 2014